OFF THE RECORD

I cuss a lot. In other news, I have adorable pets.

Yup, she’s definitely still a pup

with 2 comments

Guys.

Bailey just literally scared the piss out of Callie.

I didn’t see exactly what happened since I was in the bedroom and they were in the living room, but I’m a thousand percent sure Callie was fucking with Bailey and Bailey got pissed. Callie was yelping like it was the goddamn end of the world and Bailey was looking quite pleased with herself.

I scolded Bailey (no wonder she doesn’t like me) and told her to be patient, Callie’s just a puppy. Then I checked Callie for blood (in hindsight, maybe I should have done that first) and when I didn’t find any, I picked her up (because even if she is a big weeny, she’s still cute and c’mon, she was scared! And why do I even pick her up anymore? She’s practically as big as I am.) to console her.

That’s when I heard it: the unmistakeable sound of a healthy stream of piss hitting the couch and/or carpet.

I screamed, threw her down (or tossed her back onto the couch) and rushed her outside.

If I’d been holding her any less awkwardly, she would have pissed right on my arm and most likely soaked my entire front. And I was wearing a new sweater, so I would have been pissed… ugh, no pun intended.

I guess even if the past three or four months have seemed like an eternity to me, it’s still just been three or four months and yup, she’s definitely still a pup. Minimal bladder control and all.

If you’re totally lost and don’t know who these living things I’m talking about are, go here. It’ll explain a lot.

Oh, I almost forgot. I worked almost 12 hours today wearing a new pair of pants… with the tag still attached. I don’t know how I didn’t see it or feel it, but I’m awesome.

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Written by Kaci Johanna

January 15, 2009 at 1:44 pm

Posted in Dogs, I'm awesome

2 Responses

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  1. Oh no! That’s not good at all! But she’s still a baby. Sometimes, those things happen.

    E.P.

    January 18, 2009 at 7:27 pm

  2. A while ago when I got home I went into the bedroom and Rusty followed me there to say hi, all excited and shaking. When I went to rub his tummy he let out a stream and I FREAKED. He jumped up, looked panicked and ran out the door.

    In hindsight ’twas funny. 🙂

    sleepyjane

    January 15, 2009 at 3:52 pm


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